~1st wiken in surgery~

aku kepenatan..ketiadaan tenaga..1 week of surgery has used up all of my energy..pg td shud be got paeds class..n as planned i was happily sleeping while everybody dok dlm kls..seb baek dpt attendan..thanx to gurp..
td kuar lunch ngn jero n c'ah..jero ni bdk mrsm aku dulu..kt mrsm xpenah ckp pon..tp skang cam baik plak..itu la yg pelik psl frenship ni..once u start it br u noe how much u need a fren in ur life..ktrg mkn kt asam pedas(tmpt yg diperkenalkn oleh jijul)..bg aku sdp la..sbb xpedas sgt ngeh3x..
mlm smlm adlh my last nite kt a&e hosp muar..and at last i manage to do my 1st branula(masukkan jarum dlm vein utk msk ubat or normal saline) successfully..n God knows how overjoyed am i bcoz of dat..
smlm(22/5/09) adlh besday namia yg ke 25 klu xslh aku huhu..
erm ape lg yg jadi smlm ek??owh ma tepon aku sbb aku dh lama xkol die..tp ckp kejap je sbb aku kt dlm a&e time tu..
owh 21/5/09 ialah burfday hyuuga..aku dh wish die tru msg tp die xrep pon..xtau la die dpt ke x msg tu..
td jero ckp dh ramai kwn2 ktrg yg nk kawen n tunang..wen is my time??ntah la..am i actually thinking bout dat??naahhh..xmungkin la..

ini la rupa nye slps branula dimasukkan..

~ari penting~

smlm genap 23 thn sejak hari aku dilahirkn ke muka bumi..byk bnda jd dulu time ma ngndungkn aku..ma mmg mkn ocp(contraceptive pills)..xpenah tgal lps lahirkn anim aku..lps tu tetiba bila ma amenorrhea slm 2 bulan lebih ma pegi cek doktor..dan disahkn ma mengandung 2 bulan(aku la bayi di dlm perut itu)..so doktor tu ckp..
"bayi awk ni kemungkinan besar cacat sbbnye kesan drpd pill perancang yg awk mkn tu..so sy nasihatkn awk gugurkn je la..lg pon bayi ni br 2 bulan.."
ma n abah punye la tkejut bila dgr pkataan gugur tu..aku pon seriau bila ma cerita..den abah dgn tegasnye bkata.."xpayah la nk gugurkn..klu Tuhan nk buat die cacat nk buat cemana kite redha je la.."dan dgn itu la aku slmt dilahirkn..sadiskn??hampir2 digugurkn tuuu..

erm ari ahad yg lps iaitu 17hb diorg wat surprise for my besday dkt kfc..antara teman2 yg terlibat:
kak aima,kak elis,farid,razmi,jijul,rahim,lokman,oleen,c'ah,khairun,fiza,mail,pakwan,kak eza,akram,marie..
erm beribu2 penghargaan kpd teman2 semua..sgtla terharu!!!dan thanx jgk buat teman2 yg lain yg wish n ingt besday ku itu..

td aku kuar ngn member aku..die ade meeting kt tm ayer keroh..we went for a dinner kt ikan bakar..(sbb die teringin nk g umbai)..dh lama xjmpe die..agak lama la..rindu plak..rs cam byk bnda lg nk cerita2 tp xsmpt masa sbb die naik bas kul 10..esok die keje...nk aje aku suh die stay kt sini for a while..xpela..ade rezeki leh jmpe lg..
teringt kt puisi yg sedih..jom berjiwang:

so long..
long gone..
you n me..
listen to d sound of your breathing
staring at every part of u without u realize..
n closing my eyes upon ur smell..
i feel calm..
holding my hands tight
before they starts crawling onto you without noticing..
juz enjoying d moments spent with u..
hoping dat i cud hold u
feel ur breath touching my skin
like d gud old days..
maybe..
i still love you..

~bayani's life distress syndrome~

xde pape pon yg jd..but sumtimes at 1 point of time in our life we feel so distress..so much dat we show no emotion wen people are smiling n we even cry wen people are laughing!!!(too much rite??..)

smlm i finished my medicine posting by writing craps in my mcq n ospe papers..huh..life seems like 'never gonna change'..sejurus slps itu encik hyuuga bertandang ke melaka..lalu aku n c'ah pon kuar la to welcome him..he came wif his fren n his fren's family(i tell u its a big one haha)..mksd aku penuh la keta diorg..ktrg g mkn kt secret recipe mp n sightseeing kt a famosa n muzium kesultanan melayu melaka..(never noe dat those kind of places can be so interesting sumtimes..)skjp je..over d afternoon..say around 11 to 3..lps tu he need to go rush back to kl(biasela ikut org kn..)so he said he'll come back some other time and spend longer time wif us..

antara cite2 yg aku layan over d weekend ni---->

angels n demon
star trek
ghost(series kt 8tv)

starting from next monday i'll be torturing myself in d hands of surgery department for 2 months..n next week is my nite posting week(meaning i hv to stay back at muar hosp until 9pm)..tiring(sumtin which is most expected)..really hope i can survive well dis 2-hectic-month of surgery..wat every medical students of mmmc is afraid of..

rs mcm nk g pantai..breathe..and breathe..

~it's may~

bulan may..tiap thn pd bulan may aku akn alert sbb ramai sgt org yg aku knl burfday nye pd bulan may..yg plg ramai skali adlh mmber2 aku kt matrik penang dulu..sbbnye dkt matrik tu kami was grouped according to our birth date..so boleh kate sume org dlm praktikum aku tu gadis2 n jejaka2 may..dh lama xjmpe sume org..rindu plak..teringt zaman2 kt matrik yg penuh suke duke huhu..mcm mane la agaknye sume org skang..msti dh lain kn..
pastu in addition ade burfday naga,abg kipas,n namia(adakah ini suratan atau kebetulan haha)..

sbnrnye aku ade ward work ptg ni tp aku self-declared-leave huhu melarikn diri dr muar n naik bas tgh hari..smlm aku end posting medicine..did not went quite well im afraid..ntahla..its a simple case-hepatosplenomegaly(which i did diagnose) but i feel somewat disappointed wif my own performance for d short case..hurmm..esok ade osce n mcq..really hope i can cover up for yesterday's dumbness..
dis morning we had long case wif prof choo(very very very stimulating)..n short case wif dr chua(haha aku la yg spoil kn nama grup aku)..

ok la i better go n grab some books..

knape???

why do women cry??
why do women tend to do sumtin which 'll make 'em cry??
why do women alwez love sumone who does not love 'em??
why do women alwez put a hope in sumtin hopeless??
in the end..they juz cry..and cry..
why do women cry??
it is a weapon dat Allah has equipped each women with..
for 'em to use it whenever needed..
can i use it now??coz i really need it..

~smile never last forever~

i wonder why do i stay up until dis late at nite...is it only becoz of him??terasa buduh la plak..dh lama feel so stupid n dumb actually..but cannot help it..smpi bila pon xtau la..i hope cpt2 la aku grad tglkn dunia yg penuh pmainan emosi ni..hdpi real life n pndg ke hdpn..
kdg2 i realize dat there is some part of me yg still hoping for sumtin which is beyond possible..n i seriously hate dat part..

erm along dh blk ireland pg td..bulan 10 ni kot die blk lg..utk raya..tp xsure lg katanye..td i called mom..miss her..di saat2 ini..tp xsmpt ckp byk sbb abes kedit..dh topup tp xtepon blk sbb im sure she dh tido..

there is some saying that people who write are people who are lonely..am i??
xla..

ini rupenye kehidupan..

aku br abes tgk x-men origin wolverine..best jgk..
2 3 ari ni byk bnda jd..result diorg nye suplemen dh kuar..kak elis pass tp farid x..kesedihan tu cam sgt teruk smpikn sume org merasainye..tmasukla kami,teman2 farid,family die apatah lg,n family kak elis jgk..satu berita yg sgt mengejutkn n boleh kata sgt xlogik n xterfkir oleh sape2 pon..farid-seorg laki yg tinggi,sgt baik,n sgt pandai..tp mungkin rezeki xmenyebelahinye kali ni..tentunye ade hikmah di sebalik segalanye..

aku tgh chat ngn namia..gelak sorg2 di mlm yg sepi hehe..

membaca kata2mu..
membayangkn tawamu..
cukupla..
aku bahagia..

~alhamdulillah..selesai sudah..~

aku tgh melihat kembali gmbr2 time hari pertunangan along sabtu lalu..erm majlis yg xterlalu ringkas n xterlalu complex..adat2 tetap terjaga..sgt menarik memandangkn ni la kali pertama aku menyaksikan n also involved in such an event..
ramai jgk sanak sedara yg hadir pd hari itu..agak ketat la rumah ku yg xberapa besar tuh..tp alhamdulillah sume bnda bjln dgn lncar n semoga diberkati..
..moh kite tgk gmbr moh..

menunggu dgn debaran ngeh3x

ketibaan pihak lelaki

sesi rundingan

ibu asyarul memakaikn rantai

abah menyarungkn cincin

drpd pihak perempuan

drpd pihak lelaki

selesai acara

itu la bnda termanis yg terjadi dlm sejarah keluarga kami dlm masa tdekat ni..dijangkakan xlama lg ma n abah nk dpt menantu hehe..
ini yg terasa nk kawen jgk ni(gelenya plak)..sape nk volunteer??!!hehe